Boy Was I Embarrassed...

[calinoff]

I was just curious, have any of you had an embarrassing moment related to auto racing. Like saying the wrong thing or doing the wrong thing at a race.

I have had a "few" (no we are not going to tell the 40 year old story about my midget, my trailer and the Merc station wagon I hit)

One of the worst for me took place in the 1960's when I was doing the PR for the Hatfiled Hi Speedway in PA. We were going to run a special show and invited none other than Parnelli Jones and Jim Hurtubise to race on the 1/3 dirt ! It was truly a big event with those two legends driving there. I sent out scores of press release to all of the media with the date and particulars. That was fine...except for my column...the one I wrote for the Illustrated Speedway News. When you write a press release it has to be short and to the point, however when you write a column you as a rule have all the space you want. Mine was a masterpiece that told everything about the ARDC drivers and Jones & Hurtubise....plus a galaxy of photos. I proof read it and convinced myself that even Economacki could not write a better story (and he was great). In view of the fact that I wrote for the paper, Walter Bull gave me front page exposure. The story had all the info, drivers who were entered, the cars that were going to run...Jones & Herk and the date...! Oh wow...the date ! I put the wong date in my story and listed it one week to early ! Well you know what happened, scores of fans showed up at the track that night for a race that was going to be run the following week !!! They had to call the Hatboro Township Police to quell the un-happy fans. And all of them got free tickets for the show the next week. I cant remember but I think Parnelli and Herk ran 2-3 before a packed house. It took me years to live it down...every time I entered the ARDC pits a driver would ask me where the club was running the following week and when I told them the reply was..."are you sure"

I wonder if any of you have a story to relate here about an embarrassing moment you has at the races.

Thanks

Lenny

[richie]

During the rain delay, I slipped and fell down the bleachers atop the suites at IMS for Bump Day Qualifying in 2002. Ouch!

Or getting a firecracker shot in my face at the Paragon Speedway.

[cheeseczar]

I once put one of our driver's in the wrong heat race. Dang but did he chase me around our hauler for twenty minutes.
No, he never did catch me!

[IndyJim]

Ran in a mens restroom under the pit straight seats at Indy one year, then quickly realized the reason there was no urinals is that I was in the ladie's restroom. Got some funny looks from the ladies on their way in. Lucky, it was a practice day.

One year my cousin and I, we were about 12, were standing next to a guy passed out along Hulman drive one qualifying day. When folks would walk by, we would plead "dad, please get up, dad, please get up". Everyone felt sorry for us, not knowing we didn't know who the guy was.

[calinoff]

Indy Jim....but you did that two years in a row...Hmmmm

[NoviVespa]

This is not funny, actually it is sort of sad.
We were hauling our midget in an open trailer. We were on an expressway in Chicago. Going to pick up the driver, we got on the off ramp. Having to make a left we stayed to the left. Because the midget blocked the view thru our windows, the driver behind us could not see thru our car. In front of us was a stalled car, hood up. We pulled over to the right to get around. The driver behind us figuring an open lane to the street, accelerates to go down. We heard the crash when he rear-ended the stalled car.
Ok, we pick up the driver and are going to the same intersection to get back on the expressway. We look across the expressway at the car that got rear-ended. The driver of the car coming down the ramp is not there. It gets worse. We look at the car, and the rear-end is pretty well beaten up. I said it gets worse, a state trooper is writing a ticket to the stalled car.

[$noopy]

Rushed to get an engine problem taken care of prior to qualifying. Barely made it to the qualifying line in time, but the engine problem was solved. Ran great when first fired up and through the turn. As soon as it got out of the turn, the fuel load leveled out and the car began to sputter. It sputtered until the next turn. Then the fuel picked up and it took off. Next straight and it was sputter, sputter, sputter again. Next to slowest qualifier and missed the show. Nearly quit racing on the spot. Too stupid to put in fuel, too stupid to race.

[lanciaman]

Running in an SCCA national at IRP, our national sponsor rep was on hand. We wanted to look our best, so uniforms were ironed, the car was polished and spotless, everything laid out to perfection. I waxed my helmet, starched my seatbelts, Simonized the tools.

Went out for qualifying and got about 200 yards down the track, building up just enough speed for the hood to fly back and wrap itself around the roll bar. We'd forgotten to fasten the hood pins. I had to drive all the way around the track to the merriment of corner workers, to the pits for a quick fix. The lesson was something about focusing on the trivial and forgetting the important.

And then there was the time at Road America: we stayed at a nearby college. I hadn't paid attention to the reminder about which dorm bathrooms were gender specific as we had arrived late the previous night. Got up Saturday and strolled down the hall to the bath and took a shower. Was standing there shaving with a towel on when several young women wandered in for their showers. They didn't say anything but sort of shuffled around and smirked -- I realized it was too early in the morning to get lucky, and with my wife down the hall realized there was a decidedly fatal risk anyway-- until I finished. I finally got it and said "Am I in the wrong place?!" "Depends," said one. I got red to my toes and as I left I saw the sign clearly on the door, "Women."

[DavidM]

I was 8 or 9 and with my parents at the local track. During the races I leaned back and put my hand on something and was not sure what it was. I turned to look and I had been playing with this nice looking blonde’s foot for about 15 seconds. I looked up at her and she had a big smile on her face. I then noticed her boyfriend glaring at me. Red faced, I moved closer to mom and kept my hands in my lap the rest of the night.

[KnockOff]

Hanging around Foyt's shop, trying to stay out of the way and not screw up, I got excitied when they lit a turbo Cosworth for the first time before loading up and leaving for a CART race somewhere.

The car was still in the garage even though the double doors were open, it was loud, but not too loud because of the turbo.
They cranked it, let it idle looking for leaks, blipped the throttle a few times and shut it down.

Like a moth to a flame, I inched closer to the car as they readied to crank it again.

BANG!! POP!! FIZZZZ!!

Everyone turns to look to see what happened as I quickly lifted my boot from the battery cable running from the battery cart to the starter. Dumbass here shorted it out by stepping on it.

Black, melted, stinky rubber insulation was stuck to the bottom of my boot, and, of course, the car couldn't be started until that little fubar got fixed.

I stayed the h*ll outta the way.

[DannyB]

50th birthday, front straight at Bloomington, and they gave me a microphone.

[KevMcNJ]

I dropped the yellow flag last year.

Felt like a dope having to climb down the ladder and pick it outta the dirt.

[crashcourse]

I brought my oldest to the KC race this year and watching the last 10 laps I kept pointing to him the battle I thought was shaping up between deferran and castro neves for the win entirely missing herta stretching fuel mileage and winning the race which my oldest pointed out to me as herta got the checkered flag.

then there are a few snake pit memories that i really don't remember if you know what i mean

[mec]

Originally posted by lanciaman


Went out for qualifying and got about 200 yards down the track, building up just enough speed for the hood to fly back and wrap itself around the roll bar. We'd forgotten to fasten the hood pins. I had to drive all the way around the track to the merriment of corner workers, to the pits for a quick fix. The lesson was something about focusing on the trivial and forgetting the important.

Lmao.. Same deal for me..
I was so pizzed and embarrassed that I pulled over and sat on the side of the track for the whole session.. The safety crew wouldn't come near me... My crew covered the hood with Band Aids after they pounded it out ..

[KnockOff]

Semi-OT and I'm just glad it didn't happen to me.

Local dragstrip where we didn't get many fast, higher class cars.
So, when they pushed an injected altered to the line, everyone rushed to the fence and stood in anticipation of a wild, high speed run.

Push truck bumped the Bantam roadster down the track, but no fire from the smallblock. Dang.

So, they turned it around at the other end and pushed it all the way back down towards the starting line.

Just as it chugged parallel to the most crowded part of the stands, it coughed, backfired, and blew eight red rags from the injector stacks like 8 little mortars.

The crowd went beserk laughing and high fiving.

[lanciaman]

Originally posted by mec
Lmao.. Same deal for me..
I was so pizzed and embarrassed that I pulled over and sat on the side of the track for the whole session.. The safety crew wouldn't come near me... My crew covered the hood with Band Aids after they pounded it out ..

mec:
You don't know how happy it makes me to learn I am not the only doofus who ever did this!

[2wheelshortacar]

Racing my buddy for the money, at a little dragstip in Temple TX.

I wanted to kick his #$@# so bad.

Rolled backwards out of the lights, and lost.

[stockblock]

First year i was in the pits at Indy. In my head i was still more a fan then a pit crew member. The team was trying to get me to join.. We are sitting on the wall eating sandwiches while our driver is out on the track practicing for the 500. I was sitting to the far left furthest from pit entry. Reason was one of my favorite drivers was in the next pit. I spent more time watching him then the driver for our team. Anyway, that driver comes into the pits with a blown engine. Wow, right next to all the action. Totally, not thinking that if this guy blew his engine they are going to wave the yellow and everybody would come in. I'm watching and watching the crew in the next pit while still sitting on the wall with my feet hanging over into the pits. Did not notice everyone else in our crew got behind the wall. I'm just eating my sandwich and watching the next pit. Suddenly, I hear this loud sound look down and our driver's left front wheel stops about one foot away from my feet. He takes off his helmet laughing. Walks over to me and says " Don't worry I was not going to hit you. I knew i had a rookie in the pit. Let that be a lesson to you. In the pits you pay attention to the cars on the track and whether they are going to come in. Not what is going on in the next pit like you do in the stands." He then said come on i'll introduce you to the driver in the next pit. He was not mad at me. We were good friends. But i sure learned my lesson. Boy I was stupid.

[cheeseczar]

Hey, stockblock...care to enlighten us as to the names of those drivers?


Did I mention I once put a fuel filter in backwards in our sprinter? On the eve of one of our biggest events?

[stockblock]

Jeff

I had been a Indycar fan since i was a little kid. I was at the time a big USAC fan. Regular follower of USAC. I had been going to Indy every year when by accident i met a driver by the name of Dennis Firestone away from racing. I had seen him race before in the miniindy series at MIlwaukee. He had yet ever been at Indy. He was stunned that i knew who he was. He was surprized i knew all about all the drivers, cars, ect in the Indy car series. We became friends and i was invited to Indy when he finally decided to go their. He did a couple of great things for me I will always remember. The guy in the other pit was USAC driver Spike Gelhausen. Those were the days of the the USAC-CART war. I was
very pro the USAC drivers.

[cheeseczar]

[stockblock]

Hey are not you the one reved combined our names because we share the passion for fury

[cheeseczar]

Yeah, and he STILL can't get my name spelled right!!!
No worries this past week, however, I smoked ya!

[RacerRoy]

I love SCRA sprint cars espaecially at places like Eldora and Manzy. A few years ago I arrived at Manzy a little late at the pit gate after wheel packing had begun. The guy handling the backstretch gate didn't want to let me cross the track with cars running but I convinced him I was an old hand at this sort of thing.

He opened the gate and I started across the track and found the clay was slipperier than usual. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a car starting up the backstretch so I tried to hurry it up. I immediately sllipped and fell backwards but caught myself with one free hand before my but hit the mud.

There I was struggling to get to my feet and my but out of the mud as the car beared down on me. I felt about as stupid as I ever have and frightened at the same time. I did manage to get to my feet as the car went by and finished crossing the track to the infield.

It took about a year to recover from torn knee ligaments.

Roy C. Morris
San Juan Capistrano, CA

[calinoff]

I just thought of an incident that destroyed me in front of about 8,000 race fans. I would like to relate the story, but first I MUST have a demand for it. Like ONE person to ask me...this is a good one. That one person had better ask, because by the end of the week I am going to write about it anyway.

[IndyIRLman]

Originally posted by calinoff
I just thought of an incident that destroyed me in front of about 8,000 race fans. I would like to relate the story, but first I MUST have a demand for it. Like ONE person to ask me...this is a good one. That one person had better ask, because by the end of the week I am going to write about it anyway.

I DEMAND you tell me.

I just stumbled upon this thread. It is very funny.

[richie]

I rememeber bringing a friend to a USAC Midget race at IRP in 1993. He got a Dr. Pepper out of the cooler and dropped it on the bleachers. Without even thinking about it, he opened it up and it exploded like nothing I've ever seen. That soda blew up and shot all over the backs of fans in several rows in front of us. People were screaming "Put it down!" I was laughing so hard while all those unlucky fans were trying to move away from us. Long story short, I never invited him back to a racetrack again!

[roach]

New Bremen - 1960

Unload the car, and one of our guys starts to pour fuel in the tank from one of those old 5 Gal "Jerry Cans" - you know - the ones that had a flexible spout that leaked all over the place.

Well, it just so happens that our driver had left his helmet laying in the seat.

Yep - you guessed it. All that alcohol that was leaking ran right down into his helmet.

We pushed off for warm-ups, and about the third or fourth lap he looped it going into turn one. Push truck comes out and we refire -but about two laps later he's looping it again in the same spot!

Got him back into the pits and he was higher than a kite! Don't know if it was the fumes or absorbing the fuel directly from the helmet liner, but he was definitely out of it!


BTW - He was the 1954 MARC (ARCA) Champion.
jcr

[calinoff]

In view of the generous response I have received I am going to relate to another incident that made me look like an idiot. (No comments Littleman).

It was some time in the early 1960's that I was in the announcers booth at the Flemington Fair (NJ) Speedway watching the ARDC midget program. Just before the feature the announcer Bill Singer asked me if I would go trackside and interview the winner. How was I going to pass this opportunity to excersize my ego. Well the feature was in progress with about 15 laps to go and Ernie Mc Coy (either in the Dorer or Barclay Growler) was leading the race and I mean leading. It looked like he was driving in a different zip code, you could almost see Ernie punching the cash register going thru the corners ! Well the race is now over and the starter (may have been Nick Fornoro) tell Mc Coy that I wanted to interview him for the crowd. This was going to be great because Ernie and I were good pals. As a matter of fact he actually bought me breakfast the morning, which was rare for Mc Coy to buy anything he could get for nothing. He always said he was not cheap, but rather a good "money manager"...Yeah sure, I was at his home in Reading , Pa. and there was a pliers in the bathroom that had tooth paste on it.

Now mind you this was not a trackside interview, the fair was at Flemington and there was an actual stage at the finish line. So there we were me and Ernie and I use my standard opening phrase..."Ok fans let's hear it for the Man Of The Hour" (always brought a smattering of applause. And i open with that phrase and follow it with ERNIE McCOY.

Well from there on it it was horrible ! And the dialog went as such.

Calinoff: Great job Ernie you looked just great out there...

Mc Coy: Thanks

Calinoff: Who gave you the stiffest competition out there...

Mc Coy: all of them

Calinoff: Your car was really hooked-up wasn't it ?

Mc Coy: I guess so...

(at this point I am vibrating on stage, because Mc Coy is making me look like a dummy)

Calinoff: (grasping for questions) Do you prefer driving dirt as opposed to pavement ?

Mc Coy: No

Calinoff: So nice to have you here and congrats on a stunning win. Where are you racing next week.

McCOY: I don't know.

The entire situation would have no been so bad if the midget race was last on the card, but the stocks were up next and all 8,000 fans just sat there...watching me look stupid.

I show Mc Coy that I was shutting the mike and asked him why he did this to me. And Ernie replied to me. "Hey Cal, great interview you really brought the house down ! And you little SOB I did it because of the remark you put in your column (Illustrated Speedway News) last week..."Ernie Mc Coy is at the top of his game since he got glasses for his Seeing Eye Dog".

Ernie then waves to the crowd ans walks off the stage, leaving me there all alone, trying not to make eye contact with anyone in the crowd, I felt that my fly was open and 8,000 fans all knew about it !

We lost Ernie a few years ago to cancer, but to those who knew him he will never be forgotten. I wish he could pull that stunt on me again.

Thanks

[KevMcNJ]

good story Cal.

Thought of another embarrassing moment. Not as good as the last one. but still embarrassing.

I was a corner flagger for the URC for a few seasons.

At Albany-Saratoga around 1991 or 92, I was working turn 3 and on the initial green there was a 16 car pile up. While they were crashing on the front, the leaders were screaming down into 3. I started running to the edge of the track with my red flag to whoa them down and hit a dirt pile full speed. I tripped and wound up flying thru the air with both feet over my head

After the race that night, Kramer Williamson comes up laughing his Arse at me off cuz I did the whole thing right in front of him on the track.

Funny part is 10 years later at a totally different track he stops me in the pits and says. "you look familiar, do i know you?"

Cant remember the exact words I said, but it was something like

Do you remember that big wreck at Albany? Im the guy that fell down.

He started laughing again.